Building a Lasting Nanny–Family Relationship

Why the Interview Matters

The goal of a permanent placement is not simply to fill a vacancy; it’s to create a long‑lasting, healthy, and mutually beneficial relationship between a nanny and a family.

In the right match, trust grows naturally, communication is open, and both sides feel secure. In the wrong match, misunderstandings, unmet expectations, and frustration can surface quickly, sometimes within days. That’s why the interview stage is so important.

The interview is far more than just an introduction.
It’s a dedicated time when:

The nanny learns every detail of the position — duties, schedules, household rules, parenting style, and expectations.

The family gets to know the nanny’s personality, skills, and approach to child care, and determines if she can be an asset in their home.

Both sides should free themselves from other obligations during this meeting to focus fully on the job details and on understanding one another.

The nanny offers her time, experience, and character in exchange for fair compensation.
The family offers a work opportunity with a package of benefits in exchange for outstanding and dedicated service.

The Power of Clarity

This is the time to be thorough.

No detail is too small.
Leaving out job‑related specifics in the interview can lead to misunderstandings that may jeopardize the relationship.

Discuss work schedules down to the hour.

Review duties in detail with no “gray areas.”

Agree on pay, benefits, and any perks.

Clarify expectations around flexibility, travel, or additional tasks.

When it comes to an employment agreement, clarity is protection for both the family and the nanny.

Mutual Respect is the Foundation

It’s a mistake for a nanny to accept a lower rate, hoping the employer will recognize her value and increase her pay soon. Employers expect a nanny to deliver her best from day one, but that doesn’t guarantee a pay adjustment.

It’s also a mistake for employers to assume a nanny has no other opportunities, and to expect extra duties without extra compensation.

From the start:

Nannies should value their work and set a fair rate that reflects their experience, knowledge, training, and the emotional and physical demands of the job.

Families should respect that childcare is a professional service that requires skill, patience, and dedication. Nannies expect to be compensated accordingly.

Ask Questions, Set Expectations

A successful nanny interview is about more than making a good impression; it’s about confirming that the relationship will be a long-term.

Before the nanny begin work she should know all the important details.

Clarify that her duties will be strictly childcare-related.

A guaranteed schedule.

How will overtime be handled?

How will communication about the children be managed?

Before work begins, the family should have already known important details about the nanny.

How does the nanny handle discipline?

How does she approach developmental milestones?

How does she balance playtime, learning, and rest?

The more the nanny and the family know about each other and the work, the fewer surprises there will be.

A Healthy Start for a Healthy Relationship

When both family and nanny approach the interview with honesty, detail, and respect, they set the stage for a relationship where:

The nanny feels secure, valued, and supported.

The family feels confident their children are in capable, loving hands.

The children benefit from consistent, nurturing care.

Chemistry, that natural feeling of connection, can’t be forced. And when it’s paired with clear communication and fair terms, it’s the foundation for a lasting partnership.